Thursday, February 24, 2011

Mirror, Mirror on the Wall.......

Alarm is set for 6:05am this week... I roll over at 5:56am.. Thinking, man I have to pee and then god knows I want to crawl back into this bed for another couple hours... Knowing this is not in the forecast, I instead lay there and contemplate what I am going to wear for the day.... Jeans and a sweater, dress pants and knitted shirt, Jeans and a fitted long sleeve shirt... Ugh the descions...
By the time the alarm goes off 9 very short minutes later, the dogs are stretching out, waiting to go for their morning pee and come in for breakfast, Jordon is stirring and pleading with me to hit the snooze button and snuggle for just a couple more minutes and I am still debating my wardrobe choice of the day in my head. Much to Jordon's distaste, I crawl out of bed and begin the morning routine. After getting things going, I stand in front of the closet, pull on jeans and a sweater then move towards the mirror.
I stand there looking at myself for a moment... I look at my belly, stretched by motherhood...*sigh*. I immediately think, ugly... Then I hear the usual morning "bababa.. Daaaa-Deeeee" from the other room and then reason with that thought inside my head... The reason for that stretched belly is happily awaiting me in the room next door, and for that, it is beautiful.
I turn away from the mirror and head into the next room to see the most content little girl, smiling up at me still saying "Daaa-deee". Little bugger... I get her ready for the day, feed the dogs, get coffee and tea ready to go for Jordon and I and then head back to the bathroom to finish getting myself ready.
Starring in the mirror once again, I pick up my concealer and dab it under my tired looking eyes, sweep my hair up into a ponytail with a cute clip, add a little mascara and think, there now... not so bad for a Mom that was up 3 times last night- right?
There is the constant battle of having good self esteem and bad body image...
I pride myself on being a confident woman and with that comes the assumption that while I am confident in who I am, I am confident in my body. I try and keep myself in the positive light. After all, I was not a size 0 before I got pregnant, no sense in beating myself up for not being a size 0 now.
Of course Jordon tells me often enough that I look beautiful and I am fine the way I am. To this I simply smile and think my love really is blind...
So my question to those who read is... Where is the balance between self esteem and body image? How do you find a happy medium where you are happy with your body but don't allow your my love handles are just a part of who I am attitude become an excuse for your jean size slowly crawling up?
Would love some feedback!

Have a great day!

 Jaymie

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